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Archive for the ‘Poetry’ Category

Bombarded daily
to define myself
by some worldly standardDon't let the world tell you that you need to do or be anything - you have worth just as you are.
of success
of beauty
of worth

Is my job good enough?
Am I in fashion?
Do I make enough money?
Does my hair look right?

Is my house acceptable?
How about my body?
Do I have the right friends?
Do I hang out in the best places?

Do I make everyone happy?
Does everyone like me?
Am I a good girl?

If I align my life
with what the world says
these standards should be

will I feel satisfied?
will I feel worthy?

Nope.

Because none of it
none of the stuff
none of the opinions
none of the ways in which the world wants to define me

none of it
makes me who I am
or adds any value
to my soul

For I am fearfully
and wonderfully made
Loved
and cherished
just as I am

Without all the stuff
Without being in style
Without pleasing anyone

For nothing I do,
nothing I have done,
and nothing that has been done to me
defines my worth

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Sometimes I feel trapped
by my own decisions

Times I said “Yes”
when I should have said “No”

Times I was silent
when I really wanted to talk

Times I said “Sure”
when I meant “Nope”

Times I stayed
when I really wanted to go

Times I said “OK”
when I wanted to say “No way”

Times I smiled
when I wanted to scream

Times.
So many times.

But here’s the thing
I must remember

I can change my decisions
at any time

and I’m never really trapped after all.

It's self care to say No

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When I feel alone
in a room crowded with people

When I feel panic
swelling in my gut

When I feel worry
creeping into my brain

When I feel uneasy in any way
I know the darkness of fear
is trying to get in

I know the dark one
is trying to break me down

But I am a child of light
I am loved
I am never alone
My life mapped
My purpose designed

And like a child
into a swimming pool
I must jump
with all my being
with childlike trust
and splash and play
in waters of uncertainty
without the flotation devices
of knowledge and control
yet faith and hope
keep me afloat

So when I feel fear, panic or worry
When I feel uncertain or out of control
It’s time to let go
to live in faith
to jump in the pool
to float in trust
surrounded by love

swimming pool

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Matt 6.26

Thank you God

for taking care of me
for delighting in my life
for knowing my needs
better than I do

Thank you God

for providing for me
for lifting me up
for bringing me close to you
when I need it most

Thank you God

for loving me
for holding me
for accepting me
just as I am

Thank you God

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I wait

I wait for God
to open new doors
portals of change
though I’m not sure what

I wait for God
to meet my needs
physical and emotional
though I’m not sure how

I wait for God
to guide my steps
forward or sideways
though I’m not sure where

I wait

I wait for clarity
I wait for decisions
I wait for answers
I wait for understanding

I wait

Waiting feels helpless
powerless and futile
I want to take action
I want to have answers

Then I remember
the power in waiting
in truly waiting on God
and sitting in stillness

I can have peace while I wait
freedom in resting
deep breath in, deep breath out
I don’t have to see the whole picture
to know it is there

I can have trust while I wait
freedom in releasing
God will be there
even if I don’t know what my life will be

I can have hope while I wait
freedom in rejoicing
God is my life focus
and nothing else matters

I decide
that I will have faith

while I wait

girl waiting

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Oh, here, let me

Oh here, how about like this

Oh here, I know what you can do

Oh here, I can help

Oh here, I can do that for you

Oh here, I can make it happen

Oh here, why don’t you do it like this…

Oh here, what if you…

Oh here, how about like this…

Oh hereThe Fixer
let me
fix
everything
because
I’m the fixer

I can fix most anything
I have the best of ideas
and lots of solutions

because I am smart
and see things clearly

because I am helpful
and willing to assist

because I am giving
and have much to give

Yet
truly and deeply
if I look in my soul
I’m a fixer
to feel needed and wanted
and smart and resourceful
and important and liked
and loved

Yet
I am already all of these things
without fixing for you
so I will let you fix you
and maybe spend a little time
fixing me

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Sometimes I don’t wanna
be an adult

Sometimes I don’t want
to go to work
to pay the bills
to make important decisions
that impact others

Sometimes I don’t want
to be the responsible one
who “holds down the fort”
who takes care of everyone
who makes everything ok

Sometimes I wish
that I didn’t
know pain
know hurt
that I didn’t know
it always takes time
to heal

Sometimes I just want
to stand in the shower
until the hot water turns cold
and my hair is not yet clean
or better yet
sit in a tub
until wrinkled and shivering
shutting out the world
with the click of the door

Sometimes I just want
to lie on the couch
watch some numbing series
created in days long ago
wearing fuzzy animal pajamas
with 7up and Saltines
today comforting a soul
instead of a tummy

Sometimes I just want
to bury my fingers in warm dirt
sifting rocks from treasures
to cup my hands around a little moth
feel it flutter then fly away
to lie flat on the lawn
watching the clouds become stories
have conversation with ladybugs
and worry for her children

But I must find balance
for I am an adult

I pay the bills
to keep my comforts
I go to work
to make a difference
I make decisions
to take care of others
who have days
when they don’t wanna

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