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Posts Tagged ‘prayer’

Love.

Abstract yet concrete.real love
Emotion yet thought.
Noun yet verb.

The more we give,
the more we get…
right?

Well, no.
It doesn’t always work that way.

Sometimes we give and give and give
and we feel an empty space
in return

But is that real love?

Because sometimes
the love we are giving
isn’t exactly the
pure and selfless love
we believe it to be

When we give love
with expectations of reciprocity

When we give love
with a need for fulfillment
from others

We aren’t giving pure, true love.

Pure true love
comes from our Creator.

Pure true love
has an endless supply.

Pure true love
fills us up as we give it away

And pure true love
doesn’t need for us to do anything at all.

Just to be.
Just to give.
Through me – not because of me – not for me.

And I want to live
in that kind of love
each and every day.

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I’m excited to share that I’m going to be learning more about this kind of love as I leave for Ethiopia this week to work with an organization called Bring Love In.  They bring widows and orphans together to create “forever families” as well as help keep other families intact.

I’m going as a Coach, but I’m mostly ready to spend my time listening, learning and loving. Thank you for sending your prayers and good thoughts with me, as I know they will be absorbed by me, and in turn felt by all I meet.

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Oh Creator,
Give me the desire and the ability

to forgive myself

for times of being unaware
and not seeing things as clearly as I do now

for times of seeing acceptance
in people instead of you

for times of being naive
getting caught in someone’s snares

for times my words or actions
didn’t match who I want myself to be

for times of being human
needing space to learn and heal

for times of needing help
letting go of past hurts and old patterns

Give me the ability, desire, and the courage
to be compassionate with myself
to take steps forward
to believe I am worthy
just as I am.

04.23b self forgiveness prayer

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Oh glorious Creator,

You love me
when I am feeling (or acting) unlovable.

You hear me
when my thoughts are a jumbled mess.You love me when

You see me
when I try to hide in shame.

You love me
when I am moody and selfish.

You hold me
when I grieve devastating loss.

You protect me
when I am attacked by fear.

You love me
when I am afraid and alone.

You comfort me
when I don’t even know I’m sad.

You know me
when I am a confusing puddle to myself.

You love me
no matter what

I am
awed
amazed
thankful
joyful

that you do.

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I need to let go
of the need
for control

When I think I have everything handled
When I think I’ve got it all figured out
When I think I know the answers

I don’t.

I need to let go
of the need
for certainty

When I think I found the right path
When I think I am ready to charge ahead
When I think I see a perfect vision and purpose

I don’t.

Because certainty is an illusion
And looking for it
leads me into
hesitation
fear
paralysis

Yet if I let God
do Her thing

If I let go of the need
for control
for certainty

Then all that I need

the desire
the power
the energy
the faith

All will be given to me
Just when I need it
Just how I need it
completely and beautifully
out of my control


philippians 2.13

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Being quiet
Being still
Doing some thinking
Doing some feeling

what steps come next?
what path will be mine?
what holds my attention?
define the design…

lights and signs may flash all around me
noise and smells fill the air
stimulation overloads my senses
where do I focus?

I shuffle cards
in the deck of my life
what do I hold?
what do I fold?

What boundaries do I need to set?
What goals do I need to plan?
What will help me understand my gifts?
and use them…

Questions abound

And so I am quiet
And so I am still
Doing some thinking and feeling
and knowing
the bottom line will always be
What will bring me closer to God?

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Sometimes I feel
like I can’t figure out a thing
I don’t know where I’m going
or even who I am

I stand at an open gate
and wonder which direction to take
wonder where each path may lead
and what adventures await

Excitement and bravery
get shoved to the back of my mind
roughed up, knocked down
by negative thought bullies

I feel panic start to rise
thoughts of doubt and fear
Insecurity quickly
steals my joy

Can I trust myself?
Can I figure it out?

And then I remember

I don’t have to do this alone

I have the Holy Spirit
within me
I have a guide and a compass
right in my heart

Waiting to whisper
what step to take
who to watch out for
where to go

If I can just be still
and listen
and let the Spirit lead me

spirit lead me

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I want to live my truth

and yet…

I struggle to define it

what is real?
what speaks directly to my heart?
how do I define this life?

What is truth?My path, my truth

Others want to define truth for us
teachers, pastors, parents, friends

And for much of my life
I let them

and yet…

I don’t think I can
any longer

I feel fear
breaking molds
not meeting expectations
not fitting in

and yet…

I feel free
living authentically
living my truth
building my own faith

I will say
what it is I believe

I will determine
what is “right”

I will know
what God speaks to my heart

I will release
judgment and fear

I will be ready
to follow my heart
and all
that is revealed

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