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Posts Tagged ‘feelings’

Is it time?

Am I ready for transformation?
To come out of a cocoon,
To burst forth into the light?

Sometimes the thought scares me
I want to just stay hidden
Sheltered within the wrapping I have created

But God has other plans

He wants to
Shine His light
through His children
Show His glory
with magnificently colored wings

Am I ready to see myself
how God sees me?
Am I ready to transform?

Is it time?

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I hate
feeling hurt
feeling stepped on
feeling overlooked
feeling left out
feeling betrayed
feeling cast aside
feeling put down
feeling teased
feeling ridiculed

feeling lost.

I love
feeling included
feeling valued
feeling special
feeling wanted
feeling encouraged
feeling smart
feeling funny
feeling important
feeling happy

feeling loved.

I know
I can’t have joy without being open to pain,
but when I hurt
God is there
to help me feel loved once again.

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I am told
or sometimes tell myself
that
how I see things
is different from
how anyone else sees things
so it must not be right

But that’s a lie.

A lie told in my head
or to my face
that says “I’m different”
I’m just being “dramatic”
I’m just being “out there”
I’m just being “silly”

and so my thoughts and feelings
are discounted
I am dismissed by those
around me
or by me

but my feelings are important
my experiences have brought me
to them
I can have insight
I can have wisdom
I do have knowledge
based on those experiences
based on how I see things

and I don’t think I’m that different after all.

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Sometimes

when things are going well
things are just so right
having fun
feeling good
happy

I can’t enjoy it.

I am waiting for the shoe to drop
the bad taste to arrive
the bricks to shatter
the fist to punch
the hateful comments
to ring in my ears
to squelch my happiness

Maybe the shoe
will even be
something I do
something I say
that messes things up

Not that bad
has to be
coming
but I anticipate it will
and in doing
create an internal sabotage.

Anticipating the shoe
can be worse than the shoe itself.

But

I don’t have to live this way
I can delight in God
and know that He is there at all times

He delights in my delights
He is happy when I am happy
and He is there
when happiness is not.

He will hold me tightly
if a shoe, taste, brick, fist, or comment
comes into my life
whether I anticipate
its arrival
or not.

So

in the meantime, I need want to be happy.

Thank you, Lord, for happy.

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You can’t make me

say any certain words

feel any certain feelings

think any certain thoughts

look any certain style

act any certain way

be any certain woman

You can
criticize
cajole
critique
advise
intimidate
mock
beach stroll by Matthew Bowden“help”

but still

You can’t
make me
anything.

I choose
my actions
reactions

I choose
to know
who I am

separate from
who you think
I am

instead
connected to
who God thinks
I am

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Ever have those days
when you are just
feeling fat?

Clothes don’t fit their best
The mirror isn’t being kind
Energy is low
And you start picking on yourself

It’s not really about fatness
because it happens to us at any shape or size

It’s about self-worth
Knowing that we have value
regardless of
ANYTHING

We have to break the cycle of negative self-talk
Stop listening to the lies
Stop getting sucked into the game

Reminder:
I have value
I have a beautiful soul
I am loved by God
I am cherished by God
He made me a perfect creation

I need to stay in touch with that love
share that love with others

focus on the things that are truly important
and get over myself

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