Posts Tagged ‘respect’

how I am always tryingflowers
to take care of you
how I strain and sweat
to make sure you are ok
to make sure you are happy
to make sure your feelings aren’t
regardless of how
I am feeling

But that’s not my job
it’s not up to me
to take care of you

You are grown
You are an adult
You can make your own decisions
You can make your own choices
You can handle
your own consequences

I don’t need to be involved
I don’t need to monitor
I don’t need to
make sure
everything is ok

Yet I do.

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I have to say no.

It’s important for me to do so
and it’s being true
to what I am really feeling

So I say no
not today
not now
I’m sorry, I can’t

But then the guilt.

It washes over me
floods my thoughts
churns in my belly

How can I say no?
They need me
need my help
need my service
and maybe need God through me

so the thoughts keep spinning
that I’m just being selfish
and would it have really hurt me
to drop what I’m doing
to add more to my plate
and would it have really hurt me
to give one more afternoon

because people give to me
and so shouldn’t I give back
all that I have?
all that I am?

but then I remember
what I can be like
when I don’t take care of myself
the tailspin I can create
the emotional states
the physical decline

and then I remember
that when people give to me
give in healthy ways
it doesn’t require
of loss of myself
to them
it is a gift

and then I remember
that setting boundaries
establishing limits
makes me MORE able to help
more able to be present
more able to be me
in those times that
are appropriate

and that’s woman –
that’s who
they were asking for
in the first place

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I can change things about me
about how I interact
about how I process
about how I re-act

But if I am going to make any changes
I have to do it for me
because I want to

not for you
not because
you think I should
not because
you think
life would be
easier, better, happier
for me
(or maybe just you)

That’s your opinion
and unless I agree
and decide to make changes FOR me…

neither one of us will like me very much.

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What does love
feel like,
look like,
sound like
to you?

The answer will be so different for each of us…

I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section!

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real love
true love
selfless love
is in the heart
of each of us

it’s not about expectations
yours or mine
it’s not about the gifts we exchange
the surprises we give
or don’t

it’s about being open
being trusting
being trustworthy
never claiming
never resenting

just loving.


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It is so easy

to get confused

to blur the lines

to use sex
in place of love

to fill a void

to feel good

But it usually
doesn’t work out
that way

So, I will look for the fine line
that separates love and sex
I see that sex can be part of love
but they are not the same
and I will know the difference

I am valuable
for more than
my body
for more than
how I make you feel

and I am complete
as I am.

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Getting caught up in the “romance” around us?

Here’s to keeping some healthy perspective!

I will not let unrealistic expectations cloud my view of life.
I am loved. I am valuable. I am complete.

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